An Open Letter to Robby "Shithead" Gordon:
____

Dear Robby,

You're pissed because a woman who weighs only 100lbs is doing well in racing? Too well?

You want the field "equalized." You want to take her "advantage away?"

Does it occur to you that what she lacks in weight she also lacks in muscle, thus making it more difficult for her to make quick succession moves OR ANY OTHER FEAT THAT REQUIRES STEERING THE BLOODY CAR?

Gordon, you want Preakness jockeys wearing ankle weights too?

I didn't think so. What a dick.

Here's a free clue; adapt. If you're too !@#$ing heavy, maybe you don't deserve to win.

Listen to you. You're a NASCAR driver, the very epitome of redneck machismo and ...you're complaining about getting beat by a girl?

Time to retire.

Hugs and Kisses,
Jason
____

Yes, I actually sent it to Robby Gordon. Well, his fan site.

Christ. When I think that some dick who drives in a circle for a few hours has fans, I immediately think of "Deliverance."